Trials are simply a part of life. End of story. No one goes through life without facing many trials. Life truly is a rollercoaster. Even though I am only 15, I have learned that, when things are going great, prepare your heart for the hard times that are coming, and when everything hits rock bottom, prepare your heart for the great things lying ahead! If life was just good all the time, no one would know the beauty and the greatness of God's love and comfort! God brings us trials and tribulations, so that we can fall on Him and trust Him to love us and pick us back up!
Last Sunday afternoon, my sister and I went to visit my dad in Little Rock. This was the first time I had gotten to see him since May. I was SOOOO excited! I love my dad more than anyone on this earth! I have his characteristics, or so my mom and sister tell me all the time. My dad is the man who talked to everyone like he had known them for 10 years. He can strike up a conversation with just about anyone! Last night, my mom, sister, and I went to Colton's for dinner, and as we were waiting to be seated, a man walked in. So, I didn't wanna just stand there awkwardly, so I was like, "Hello sir! How are you tonight?" He said, "Good! How are you?" I said, "I am doing great! It's pretty busy here, huh?" and then we just took off. Haha! We ended up talking about the house he built, his dogs, my pets, school, football, it was great. And my mom and sister were like, "You are just like dad". I love that. So anyways, we went to visit my dad and he told us to come up to his room for a few minutes and that he wanted to talk to us. So, we went up there and he said, "sit down for a minute." So I sat down next to him, and he patted my leg before telling me something, like he always has since I was a baby. I had a feeling that it wasn't going to be good. He told us that, becuase of his family not talking to him, and his other 2 children (my half brother and half sister) moving to different states, he decided that he would move back to Oklahoma, where he lived in 2007-2008. He lives in one of the highest rated crime parts of Little Rock, and it's right in the middle of a run down neighborhood. I broke down. I couldn't understand why this was happening. My dad was already barely in my life, and now he is going to be in my life even less. I didn't pray and I didn't talk to anyone. I just went to my room and sat there. Finally, I gave into God. I prayed and just put everything at His feet. Psalm 34:18 says, "The Lord is close to the broken hearted." Romans 8 also says, "Everything God does is for the good of those who love Him." I was no longer relying on my own strength, but on God's. This happened the day before school. 90% of me wanted to go to school on the first day, in a t-shirt and sweatpants with my hair in a ponytail and just mope around the whole day. But thank goodness for that 10% that was all God that reminded me that this is going to be for the good, and that I just have to faithfully rely on the Lord to pull me through. Monday ended up being the best, first day of school, of my life! It was such a good day, and a lot of good things came out of it! I am very unsure of where God is going with this, but something I am sure of is that He knows what He is doing, and that I can trust Him. So that's what I am doing.
It may be weeks, months, or years before something good comes out of my dad moving, but it won't always be so bad. If God has put you right in the middle of something that you just don't think you can get through, or you don't think you can ever find happiness in, just keep taking each day a step at a time, becuase I promise life won't always be so tough. It's just the dark before the morning! The good times are right around the corner. :)
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